Friday, January 22, 2010

a mommy needs attention too, right?

Photobucket
because I can't always be here...

I've been cleaning out closets, drawers... getting rid of all of the excess. A fresh start for the new year, I suppose.

I've never been one for New Year's resolutions. But I have been thinking about some changes I want to make. So call it a resolution, if you must.

Every mom gets to a point where the focus shifts completely away from her, sometimes losing sight of who she is. And that's ok for a bit, I guess. But I don't think it's healthy for a long period of time.

My focus has been shifted for too long.

It's time to start taking care of myself too. And not feel bad about it.

All I have ever really wanted to do is stay at home, take care of my husband and babies. So this isn't a complaint. I wouldn't change what I'm doing for anything. It's just that this residency life hits from all directions. The stress, the loneliness, the frustration, seeing your husband exhausted beyond what he should be.  And I'm afraid that if there's not some sort of balance, there won't be much more of me left to give.

So, I'm thinking about ways to improve and really, just nourishment for my soul.

Efficiency is a big one. Time, how I spend money, keeping up with the house. I've started to watch how we spend money, knowing how much things cost, making smarter decisions. So empowering. More time with God, not just giving Him my leftover time, if there is any. Taking better care of my body. My skin. I just bought my first eyecream. :) My poor, neglected wardrobe (if you can even call it that) needs some attention... no more just looking in the children's section. More dates with my husband. More girls' nights out. More than two haircuts a year. More red wine... for ya know, a healthy heart and all. More time for reading. And maybe even a pedicure or two.

If I do these types of things, it's going to make me a better wife, a better mom. More fulfilled. Motivated. Encouraged. Happier. And we all know the phrase... if Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy.


 

14 tellin' me what I want to hear!:

elle's mom said...

2 thumbs up. i got a haircut yesterday and i STILL feel guilty for spending the money...and the money on some hair product. the last time i had hair product (aside from shampoo & conditioner)? Christmas 2008 when Santa put it in my stocking.

hang in there!

Bea said...

Amen, sister! You are so right-- if you aren't happy it's hard for you to take care of others around you. You are very deserving of some more "me" time!

LauraD said...

Good for you!

Milk Maker said...

You deserve it! I know I always get more done around the house and am a better wife and mother when I take the time for those things! Enjoy!

Allison said...

This is exactly me too. I've always wanted to be able to be a SAHM and I'm so happy that I'm able to, but in the process, I've also let myself go and now that I'm pregnant again I feel like it's starting all over again. I'm also slacking in the house, money, etc.. areas as well...

Sigh... :)

Desiree said...

Two thumbs up, agreed! And you lucky girl, I've been using eye cream for at least 4 years. ;o) We need to take care of ourselves in order to be able to hold the world on our shoulders. And I just bought some red Argentinian wine last week to celebrate after baby arrives... but I've had to hide it from J! If we had a corkscrew, he would have finished it off by now! LOL

Cindi said...

Balance? what's that? LOL.
Good for you!
Here's to all us neglected mommies (raising a glass of wine and fading to Whitney's "I'm every woman...")

Robertson's said...

Brought a little teat to my eye - might need to mark this post to read um daily for myself! Thanks Trisha - I needed this reminder.

Katie L said...

Exactly. You said what every Mama thinks and needs.

Dion said...

Good for you! Nothing wrong with putting yourself first. If not first, then we should at least not fail to add ourselves to the list, huh?

Minnie said...

IT'S ABOUT TIME!!! You have given up so much over the past several years and I am so proud of you! Don't feel guilty one lil bit either! You are just a good wife and Mother who loves her family and has made personal sacrifices for them over the past years.

I am just a phone call away to come and glady babysit so you can go on dates... or bring them here for several days.

Your birthday is right around the corner, so I can see some $$$ FOR new items for your wardrobe, some hair cuts, and pedicures, etc ;o)

Nana said...

This is so true and important. You have always put the kids before you and they don't appreciate much except time anyway. I always felt guilty doing anything for myself as well and we rarely did much besides some weekends with just the two of us (glad we did that at least). I see much of the opposite in my line of work, but I'm not worried about you getting self centered. Don't be afraid to ask our help!

Sappies said...

What a breath of fresh air. I agree with all you have said and totally support you in this. I would also be happy to assist you in "girl time". Shopping, movies, wine, you name it, I'm up for it.

Love you

La

Jessi said...

Good for you! Sadly, finding balance is so difficult when the little people depend on us SO much.

And truthfully, just a little bit of 'me time' goes a long way and keeps me from becoming "5 o'clock Mommy".

Just wish I lived closer...I'd love to join you for a pedicure, movie, wine, and shopping. :-)

 
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