baptism bash

This was such a special day!

Watching two of your kids proclaim their love for Jesus publicly.

Seriously what it's all about! 

 

I'll never forget the night last fall when they asked Jesus into their hearts.

 

And I'll never forget seeing their excitement on this day.

They keep asking when they can get baptized again, they loved it so much. :)

God is so good!

 

time well spent

The time, always the time, I'm an amateur trying to beat time. The six kids rouse. We race. The barn... and hurry. The breakfast... and hurry. The books, the binders... and hurry! In a world addicted to speed, I blur the moments into one unholy smear. I have done it. I do it still. Hands of the clock whip hard. So I push hard and I bark hard and I fall hard and when their wide eyes brim sadness and their chins tremble weak, I am weary and I am the thin clear skin, reflecting their fatigue, about to burst, my eyes glistening their same sheer pain.

The hurry makes us hurt.

I don't really want more time; I just want enough time.

I just want time to do my one life well.

-Ann Voskamp

Being in a hurry. Getting to the next thing without fully entering the thing in front of me. I cannot think of a single advantage I've ever gained from being in a hurry. But a thousand broken and missed things, tens of thousands, lie in the wake of all the rushing... Through all that haste I thought I was making up time. It turns out I was throwing it away.
-Mark Buchanan

These are words from a book I am reading right now. Oh, it is speaking to me. One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. It's just what I need right now as Kyle and I are taking steps to simplify and get to the place where God wants our family to be. Being thankful for what we have today. Right now. Maybe doing things a little different than the next family, maybe doing some things the same. Changing things up according to what is on our hearts.

But what always seems to get in the way no matter how I try to keep things/activities/obligations to a minimum is my unnecessary need to get things done. I'm guilty of flying through moments just to check each one off the list.

I've even found myself rushing through this book so I can move on to the next.

And I feel that I am thankful for this life. Every bit of it.

But am I really? Do I stop and notice the details? The amazing details in each day that show God's love and power? Because they are everywhere. All around me.

So I am making an effort to slow down and really enjoy this book and the poetic words that fill its pages. And while I'm at it, enter into each moment of my day. Rush my kids less. Love my family more. Thank God for the blessings, big and small.

We are merely moving shadows, and all our busy rushing ends in nothing.
We heap up wealth, not knowing who will spend it.

Psalm 39:6

birthday weekend

It was probably one of the most memorable birthdays I've had, or ever will.
Hayes got baptized. He had a bunch of people who love him there to share in the celebration.
It was a pretty special day.

 

a child is born!

Happy Birthday Jesus!

christmas time is here...

A few more advent activites to wrap up our calendar. We'll finish tomorrow with baking a birthday cake for Jesus and watching The Nativity Story. 

We'll spend our first Christmas together tomorrow... just our little family. Seems like it's been Christmas all week long though. We just got back from spending several days with the lovelies below. Had a great time. We're very blessed to have so many people that love us.

Merry Christmas!

while we run around this season....

let us not forget, it's because of His love we celebrate.

feelings of failure

Seems like more often than not, I feel like I am failing while trying to be the best mom I can be. Did I discipline the wrong way? Could I have handled that situation better? Blah, blah, blah. I just read a book that taught me a lot and reminded me that it's not just me who experiences these feelings. We all feel this way. Nobody's perfect, right? So I am posting this prayer from Dr. Dobson so I can come back to it quickly when I'm feeling down in my role as Mommy.

"Lord, You know my inadequacies.
You know my weaknesses, not only in parenting, but in every area of my life.

I did the best I could, but it wasn't good enough.
As You broke the fishes and the loaves to feed the five thousand,

now take my meager effort and use it to bless my family.

Make up for the things I did wrong. Satisfy the needs that I have not satisfied.

Wrap Your great arms around my children, and draw them close to You.

And be there when they stand at the great crossroads between right and wrong.
All I can give is my best, and I've done that.

Therefore, I submit to you my children and myself and the job I did as a parent.
The outcome now belongs to you."

Philippians 3:13-14

Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead,
I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

you're beautiful

I see you there hanging on a tree

You bled and then you died and then you rose again for me

Now you are sitting on Your heavenly throne

Soon we will be coming home

You're beautiful

When we arrive at eternity's shore

Where death is just a memory and tears are no more

We'll enter in as the wedding bells ring

Your bride will come together and we'll sing

You're beautiful

We love Phil Wickham's music at our house. I listen to it over and over. Even the kids love to sing it out. Well, this song has rocked my world twice lately.

Once, when I was driving early in the morning as the sun was coming up and last Sunday night at church.

Just thought I would share in case you need your world rocked. :)

once upon a marriage

I don't mean to keep throwing Life Church sermons your way. It's not my intention. But I had to share this one on marriage. While I listened to the second sermon of Once Upon a Marriage, I had that sick feeling in my gut. Oh no, I'm Jezebel. Ok, maybe not the murdering, malicious part of her, but definitely at times, the belittling comments to my husband and trying to take over when I think I can do something better. (Think disciplining kids, not pulling hair out of the drain... yummy.)

Oh, I so don't want to be that kind of girl. I want to be an encouragement to my husband, building him up when he needs it the most. But sometimes it's hard to remember when emotions run high, everyone's tired and I just feel like being a brat... to put it nicely. :)

And Kyle, I guess this is me publicly telling you that I'm sorry for not being more supportive of you when you needed it, not being more uplifting in times of weakness. I want to be better. So hold me to it, ok?

I hope everyone can find the time to watch this series. I'm betting you'll learn a thing or two.

ugh.

I have to admit. I'm having a hard time being a mommy right now. I feel defeated and worn down and don't feel like I'm making any progress. I'm so tired of being mean. I'm tired of no one listening to me. I'm tired of yelling at my kids. I'm tired of feeling like a single mom.

What really gets me is that there are these amazing moments with each of my kids... moments that remind me how blessed I am. Hayes picking a flower and placing it in my hair, Embry grabbing a book and snuggling up to read with me, Ellie just out of the blue saying, "I love you Mama."

Oh, but how quickly I forget when things don't go as they should.

Why can't those moments stick with me during the difficult times and help me to focus on the mother I long to be?

A mother who embodies the fruit of the Spirit.

It seems impossible really with our day to day battles but if I've learned anything, I know that nothing is impossible with God. So I am committing to spend the time to learn about each of these fruits. I pray that God will work on my character and that my children will see his work through my actions.

Galatians 5:22-23

22But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.

on my mind

I came across this excerpt from Francis Chan of Cornerstone Church. Too powerful to not pass along...

You passionately love Jesus, but you don't really want to be like Him. You admire His humility, but you don't want to be THAT humble. You think it's beautiful that He washed the feet of the disciples, but that's not exactly the direction your life is headed. You're thankful He was spit upon and abused, but you would never let that happen to you. You praise Him for loving you enough to suffer during His whole time on earth, but you're going to do everything within your power to make sure you enjoy your time down here.

In short: You think He's a great Savior, but not a great role model.

The American church has abandoned the most simple and obvious truth of what it means to follow Jesus: You actually follow His pattern of life. I pray for those who read this article- that we don't become cynical or negative toward the church. Instead, let's make a personal decision to stop talking so much and begin living like Jesus. Then we can say as the apostle Paul, "Follow my example, as I follow the example of Christ" (1 Corinthians 11:1). My guess is that you've never had someone say that to you, and you've never said it to anyone else. Why Not?

See full article here.

give me your eyes

I can't stop listening to this song by Brandon Heath.

Lord, give me your eyes for just one second.
Give me your eyes so I can see.
Everything that I keep missing.
Give me your love for humanity.

Give me your arms for the broken-hearted.
The ones that are far beyond my reach.

Give me your heart for the ones forgotten.

Give me your eyes so I can see.

on my mind

needing to escape

I've been thinking lately about what it is that draws me to the computer. Why am I always trying to sneak away and steal some time to myself? Why is there this longing to escape?

I realized that when I'm sitting in front of the computer, reality just sort of fades into the background. I don't have to worry about everything that's going wrong at home, I can just 'check out' for minutes throughout the day and 'check in' to the lives of friends.

Staying at home and being a wife and mommy is the place where I have always wanted to be. So why is it so hard? So hard to enjoy sometimes? It's what I've always wanted to do and yet, I feel like I am unhappy more than I should be. Yeah, there's the obvious reasons of kids not getting along, residency, finances. But then there are other things that I pray will change. And they don't. And my heart continues to ache.

And then I remind myself that I was not made for this world. Life is supposed to hurt. Many more failures are sure to come. More disappointments. My heart will break once again. So I wipe away the tears and move on.

God, soften my heart so it's you I run to as my escape... every time. I know that sneaking away and spending time with you is what I need. Help me to see the beauty when all I see is negative. Amen.

2 Corinthians 4:16-18

16Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. 17For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. 18So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.

on my mind

Matthew 20:28

For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve others and to give his life as a ransom for many.

Mark 9:35

He sat down, called the twelve disciples over to him, and said, “Whoever wants to be first must take last place and be the servant of everyone else.”

Philippians 2:3-4

Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. 4 Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too.

on my mind

Luke 12:34

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

on my mind

Here's some good stuff from Craig at Life Church. It's from the first message in the Zip It series. Oh, does this hit home. It's so easy to let the negative creep in, isn't it?

From a negative heart overflows negative words which generally become negative actions resulting in a miserable life.

Your words reveal the condition of your heart.

James 1:26
If anyone considers himself religious and yet does not keep a tight rein on his tongue, he deceives himself and his religion is worthless.

Think about what you have been complaining about and look at it from a different perspective.

Philippians 4:8
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

I will not hang out with negative people.

Corinthians 15:33
Do not be misled: "Bad company corrupts good character."

I will speak words of life.

Proverbs 18:21

The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.

I will be thankful for what I have.

1 Thessalonians 5:18

Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

Matthew 12:34-37

"You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks. 35The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. 36But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. 37For by your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned."

in his hands

Embry and Ellie were approaching one. Walking wasn't their main mode of transportation. So things up high weren't really on my radar. I for sure didn't think they could reach the top drawers in the kitchen. Specifically the one with knives.

I heard a crash, followed by crying and went running into the kitchen to see what happened. Ellie had pulled up on the cabinet and yanked the entire knife drawer out and on top of them. Knives all around them. Not one scratch. I sat down on the floor and cried with them.

Seeing what happened, it's impossible that not one single knife touched them. Well, not impossible when God's got a hand on the situation.

It makes me sick to my stomach to think about what could have happened, especially with them both looking up watching the knives shower down over them. Isn't it comforting to know God is there to protect our babies when we're not? Even when we are?

I am going to start praying more for my kids. More specific prayers... not just a blanket prayer that covers the bases.

I don't ever want to take the power of prayer for granted.

I don't ever want to take these little blessings for granted.

Like with everything else, time will go by too fast. Before I know it, they will be grown and I will be wishing for that tug on my leg from a little someone who wants Mommy to hold them just because. I will be wishing that I would have stopped what I was doing more often and just soaked up that baby love, not giving a second glance to a dirty kitchen or a pile of laundry. I want to be that Mommy now.

I want to be their comfort, like my God is for me. Always loving, with arms open.

May I never be too busy to love them.

May I protect them the way only a mother can and find the peace knowing that God will take care of the rest. Like he did one night when a mom was too naive about a knife drawer.

He's got the little bitty babies in his hands.

He's got the whole world in his hands.

Psalm 91:9-13

9 If you make the Lord your refuge, if you make the Most High your shelter, 10 no evil will conquer you; no plague will come near your home. 11 For he will order his angels to protect you wherever you go. 12 They will hold you up with their hands so you won’t even hurt your foot on a stone. 13 You will trample upon lions and cobras; you will crush fierce lions and serpents under your feet!

Psalm 34:7

For the angel of the Lord is a guard; he surrounds and defends all who fear him.

on my mind

Mark 11:23,24

I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, 'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.

addison road

Addison Road rocks. Just in case you needed some music to download with those Itunes giftcards you got in your stocking! :)

Seriously. I can listen to their music all day long. This entire album is amazing. A couple other of my favs are Always Love and What Do I Know of Holy.